Art as Therapy For a Grieving Heart

I lost a friend yesterday.  Her death was sudden and unexpected, leaving me shocked and confused.   How could this happen?

Today, I awoke to a world without my friend and it seemed so odd.  As is my tendency, I got out my art supplies and began to process using art as therapy for my hurting soul.

This therapeutic process is very helpful during any stage of grief.  It is something to do with your thoughts and emotions when you feel helpless.

A Simple Mixed Media Process:

• First, take out a 9×12 piece of mixed media paper ( any size will work, just make sure it’s thick paper like mixed media or watercolor paper) and a pencil and begin writing words that come to mind about your person. Don’t filter them, just scribble them across the page. This step is very cathartic and you shouldn’t worry about what you’re writing because it is going to get covered up.

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• Next, get out some paint (watercolors, acrylics, whatever you’ve got!) and just paint over your writing.  I used colors in the red, orange and pink family.  By sticking to colors next to each other on the color wheel, you will avoid making muddy colors when they mix.  You can let your writing peak out in places or completely cover it up with the paint.  Artist’s choice!

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• Once the paint drys, add some depth and texture by using some stencils, and stamps randomly over your paint.  Just do whatever feels good to you in the moment. Fill that page with your love, your grief, your memories, etc.

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• Now Decide on a shape or image you want to have at the end. I chose a heart as my friend was so generous with hers.

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• Draw that shape with a pencil or better yet, a Stabilo All pencil, and then paint the negative space ( the space around the shape ) with gesso, or a light or dark color paint. I chose an almost white pink and didn’t paint it all the way to the edges leaving a sort of frame.

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• If you’d like to you can use a darker color to paint a ‘shadow’ on one side of the inside of the shape to add a little dimension.  You can see I painted a deep pink on the left side of the heart for a shadow.

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• Finishing Touches: add words or whatever you’d like as a finishing touch. At this point, I’m leaving mine pretty simple. The goods are packed in the layers that only I know about. Others can see a peak into the layers here and there but that’s all. For example, the circles that you can see throughout the page (under the final layers) represent all of us whom she touched with her caring heart.

This is time well spent, thinking, grieving, and pouring love out on the paper. Afterwards, you have a special piece of art to cherish.

​Another Example (similar but a bit different)

When my grandmother died, I did a similar mixed media process using notes she had written to me as a background (look closely at the sky).  She loved gardening so I made a garden with special things like her button collection, pictures of her garden, and even little pictures of her!  Can you find the little grandmas in this painting?

I’ll leave you with this quote that a friend shared yesterday:

Grief, I’ve learned, is really just love.

It’s all the love you want to give, but cannot.

All that unspent love gathers up in the corners of your eyes, the lump in your throat, and in that hollow part of your chest.

Grief is just love with no place to go.

-Jamie Anderson

Life is fragile, hug your loved ones and eat dessert first.

Be well my friends,

Kim